Audience feedback

I have asked a number of people their opinion on their opinions of my draft as well as reviewing it with my teacher. As a result of this, I have got an idea of what I need to do to improve this draft. Below is a list of ideas for changes:

• A need to revise the exterior shots ("overly domestic looking") of the back yard to be replaced with a female singer.
• A change for a larger majority of the shots to be in back and white.
• A change in the nighttime driving shots to make the shots not black and white but more saturated and to emphasize certain details in the shot without influencing the quality of the shot.
• Rejection of the direct religious iconography in favor of a candle burning down over time in a time lapse way as well as a time lapse of the sun setting behind a hill. This can also be inter-cut with the woman as well.
• Removal of the shots of the burning paper but potentially replace with burning paper with writing on it to add more meaning to it.